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Mother's Regret by Our-Celestial-Death Mother's Regret by Our-Celestial-Death
This was made for the Star Wars Club Contest-    Contest 13- Childhood of Kylo Ren - WINNERS!:trophy:
Sorry the juding took so long, guys! There were quite a few more fictions than usual, and the judges read them all. :faint:
In the judge's Section
:bulletblue: First place :bulletblue:
What the judges were saying:  We really enjoyed this quick simple fiction about
Ben's early years. Here Ben is experiencing nightmares that don't seem quite within the
realm of what a normal kid's nightmares should be...

:bulletblue: Second place :bulletblue:
What the judges were saying:  This delightful illustration pictures
a young hopeful Ben with a familiar creature from a recent TV show. ;)
We loved the details on this one, and the caricature is spot-on with how a young Ben
might look.

:bulletblue: Third place :bulletblue:
What the judges were saying:  A very creative entry featuring
how the Force might feel to a child like young Ben

+++UPDATE: WOOHOO! I won second place by popular vote! Thanks!!

This was also based on a rather heartbreaking blurb about Leia that I read on tumblr awhile back: Just Visiting, notbecauseofvictories: notbecauseofvictories: ...

leia still has them stored somewhere on her personal holobank. All the transmissions ben sent from luke’s, sullen beneath the messy fringe of his hair, with ears like satellites (you’ll grow into them, han and leia must have promised a thousand times; she wonders if he did)

she likes watching them, those nights when their intelligence has dried up and the senate is stonewalling her again, or one of her pilots didn’t come back and she has to inform the family—when she’s already hit bottom and there’s nothing to do but crawl a little further down, where at least it’s warm, familiar. The particular pain she feels counting ben’s moles as he talks about lightsaber drills is second-nature now; there’s a part of heart that exists only to ache when he says, in a voice on the edge of cracking, mama, can I come home now?

(she has four years’ worth of transmissions saved on the holobank. he says it a hundred and seventy eight times. (she knows, she counted that night han left.) At first, it was the refrain of every message—mama, please, I don’t want to be here, I’ll be good, please, can I—but it had fallen off, gradually replaced by a distraction, a distance. 

at the time, she had taken it as a sign that he was adjusting, settling into life at the temple. it had been a good thing.)

yes, leia says, fifteen years too late into the empty dark of her quarters, those nights when there is no more down to go, just her and the ghosts who left her behind. come home.

the next time she sees ben, he is bleeding. (he is dying) and all she can think—dully, through the white-sharp shock of love and anger and panic—is, oh. he grew into the ears.

rey is saying something (she half-carried him from snoke’s crumbling fortress, the absurd height of him draped over her narrow shoulders and leia has never been so grateful for the strength of this girl, forged in heat) and rey is saying something but leia can’t hear it, she can’t hear anything, not even the war, the sound of cannons and blasters that was crowding her ears a moment ago. All of it is gone, and leia is counting the moles on ben’s face.

he looks tired.

mama, he says weakly, and rey startles into silence, looking at him with wide eyes. There is blood oozing from the corner of his mouth and the voice is all wrong, a man’s voice—but that same part of leia is aching, still. mama, he says. can I come home now.

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ViiPuff Featured By Owner May 27, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
MY HART. IT HURTTSS. This is such a nice drawing thank you so much I love every single one of your pieces aaaaaaa
Our-Celestial-Death Featured By Owner May 27, 2017  Professional Digital Artist
Thank you!!
MEME-SOUL-13 Featured By Owner Mar 13, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist

Tho seriously. You are a really good writer and artist!!!!!
Our-Celestial-Death Featured By Owner Mar 14, 2017  Professional Digital Artist
sorry to rain on ur parade but i did not write the blurb on top there but there is a link to the original poster if u want to send them ur love

but thank u about the art as i am the artist and i appreciate ur enthusiasm 
Ovrlralex Featured By Owner Dec 15, 2016
If Vader was hear he would tear snoke up for doing this to his grandchild
Our-Celestial-Death Featured By Owner Dec 16, 2016  Professional Digital Artist
If vadar was still alive he would have thrown hands
MonsterH21SW Featured By Owner Aug 1, 2016  Student Traditional Artist
Cry forever NOOOO sobbing - crying Danisnotonfire: FEELS 
"And what is this leaking affecting my eye?
Does the oil that is dripping mean this is a cry?"

WUT?!Llama Emoji-56 (Hiding) [V3] wutishappeningtomyfeels?

Unicornarama Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2016  Student General Artist
Right in the feels!
bear27 Featured By Owner Jun 17, 2016
😭 amazing! Oh, the feels! 
Our-Celestial-Death Featured By Owner Jun 17, 2016  Professional Digital Artist
It hurts just right
WindySilver Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
Oh dear! This sure broke my heart!
Our-Celestial-Death Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2016  Professional Digital Artist
Flaming-Starfish Featured By Owner May 31, 2016
I really enjoy your style, it's super cute :heart:
Our-Celestial-Death Featured By Owner May 31, 2016  Professional Digital Artist
Thank you!!
ProfDrLachfinger Featured By Owner May 30, 2016  Professional Interface Designer
My heart! I'm Dead 
And your art style is absolutely amazing by the way! 
Our-Celestial-Death Featured By Owner May 30, 2016  Professional Digital Artist
Thank you!!
RensKnight Featured By Owner May 30, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
Oh my gosh...that is absolutely heartbreaking, the look on his face as Snoke reaches for him.  Poor baby!!!

I don't want him to die though!! :(
Our-Celestial-Death Featured By Owner May 30, 2016  Professional Digital Artist
i felt myself die when i drew this because he really is a baby here  

hes too smol too little this is unfair
RensKnight Featured By Owner May 30, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
The enormity of Snoke's crime really becomes evident here. To attack the mind of a child is just about the worst thing imaginable--worse, in my mind, than even murder.

I think the tears he shed on the bridge and the sorrow he showed AFTER he committed the worst act of his life, however, are proof that something in him is still alive. At least that's the assumption I'm writing on, because I don't want to think there is no hope.
winterStorm42 Featured By Owner May 30, 2016
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